Don't mess with mom

1.  When I open up a five secrets post and it's all about how someone still loves their ex but cheated blah blah blah I immediately close it and move on (like they should do by the way).  It's boring and I can guarantee that it's no secret in everyday life to your friends and probably even your object of obsession.  

2. I am afraid I'm becoming an alcoholic.  I drink every single        

night and LOVE it.  I also smoke pot every night but somehow that doesn't seem as bad even though it's illegal.

3.  I would murder any asshole who ever hurt my daughter

and not think twice about it.  Whenever I see these dick-less child abusers, physical,mental, emotional, what have you, I wish them torture and pain.  They should be executed along side the murderers and probably deserve it more anyway.

4. I wanted to fuck my husband on our first date but he didn't and I'm glad.  I was such a skeez back then it would have probably turned into a one night deal.  We have now been married 3 years and have a little girl.  :)

5.  I sometimes pretend to have an English accent when I'm alone.  

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