Mercy divorce

This isn't my first time posting on here. My husband reads these secrets everyday and i know for sure he has read the ones i have posted. I am honestly hurt by the fact that he didn't figure out that it was me who posted them. I really thought he knew me well enough to guess it or at least be suspicious enough to ask if it was me.

When my husband and i were dating he asked me to have a 3way with him. I told him no and all the reasons why i was against it but, in the last year i have come around to the idea and want to try it. Problem is that last time i asked if he was still wanting one he said he didn't anymore and now i am scared to ask him to do one with me.

Sex with him is amazing when we actually get around to it. I don't think he is happy with it tho bc we don't have it nearly as often as we used to bc of life getting in the way. I fear everyday that i have to leave for work without taking care of his morning wood that he is going to cheat on me that day. We fight a lot bc of it.

I wish my husband was more willing to do what he knows are my fantasies in bed. I feel like i am inconveniencing him if i ask him to do something he isn't doing on his own for me. I also wish he had more fantasies of his own that i could fulfil for him to make things a lil different sometimes.

I know he loves me and our child but i feel deep down that he resents us as well bc there is so much he could do if he didn't have us to worry about. Sometimes i think about breaking my own heart and leaving him so he could do the things we keep him from and be happy without having the guilt of leaving us or having his family judge him for it.